Tuesday, February 27, 2007

"Oh my gosh you are so strong"

"I could never do what you are doing"

both innocent statements but equally annoying....I get so frustrated when people tell me how strong *I* am because NONE of this has been done in my strength. I want people to see and know that God is doing this because I can't. I guess that is where the frustration comes in because God should be getting the glory not me. I know part of it is my fault because I hide a lot of my feelings so people don't realize how hard this is for me.....I want to say FTR this IS hard and there is no way I could have done any of it without my Fathers help. I have to constantly give this back to Him because I try to do this in my own strength and I can't. In fact, recently I tried to do something and actually got in my bed and curled up in a fetal position and cried. Yes, I am 37:-) I wanted so much to give up. I was blessed to have a wonderful friend that not only knows my heart but always points me to God to remind me that I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength. I sometimes...ok a lot of the time... need to be reminded of that. This IS hard but I have the comfort of knowing that *I* don't have to do this alone because I do have my Father...He loves me:-)


Larissa said...

Wow...that was good. I read what you write and think it's me who is saying it! I can totally identify. Stay strong...our hope and faith in God are the only things we have that will truly get us through this!

Ame said...

Yes, Barbie - I'm with you all the way on this. Telling people it's not about you but about God is all we can do. I think sometimes what comes through is their fear that THIS will or could happen to them, too, and then what?

Psalm 42:6-8 says:

"My soul is downcast within me; therefore I will remember you from the land of the Jordan, the heights of Hermon—from Mount Mizar. Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls;all your waves and breakers have swept over me. By day the LORD directs his love,at night his song is with me—a prayer to the God of my life."

It wasn't till I was in SUCH deep places that I finally understood "deep calls to deep." Deep what calls to deep what?

And God showed me - He goes before me; He is already in my deep; waiting for me, calling to me; before I even get there. He doesn't only NOT leave us alone; He doesn't only fill us with ALL His strength b/c ours is completely depleted and then some, but He also goes before us, preparing us, preparing the way, and waits for us there to come to Him when we get there. Really cool :)

Barbie said...

Oh Ame:******) THAT so blessed me. oh you have NO IDEA how much! Thank you so much for letting God use you. WOW.